Category: Humour

Conspiracy theories used to be fun! Now everyone is freaking out about everything all at once | First Dog on the Moon | Opinion | The Guardian

Screenshot_2020-05-18 Conspiracy theories used to be fun Now everyone is freaking out about everything all at once First Do[...]via Conspiracy theories used to be fun! Now everyone is freaking out about everything all at once | First Dog on the Moon | Opinion | The Guardian

They Tell Me The Internet Is Down; I Know Bill Gates Is To Blame… – » The Australian Independent Media Network

It does strike me as a little premature for the Treasurer and others to start saying that whatever we spend now will have to be paid back. While we need a nuanced discussion about the best way to get the economy roaring along like the turtle it was pre-Coronavirus, to tweet something like that seems a bit premature. Like a doctor telling a family just before someone has surgery that the bill will need to be paid even if the patient dies.

It’s true, but it does make him sound as though the main thing on his mind is the health of his bank balance rather than the health of his patient.

via They Tell Me The Internet Is Down; I Know Bill Gates Is To Blame… – » The Australian Independent Media Network

Coronavirus: Trump reveals Homeland study claiming COVID-19 struggles to survive in sunlight, heat

US President Donald Trump encouraged Americans to go outside into the sun.

There’s China the doers and the along came the dumber than (ODT)

“Then I see the disinfectant, where it knocks it out in a minute, one minute, and is there a way we can do something like that by injection inside, or almost a cleaning?” Trump asked Bryan from Homeland Security.

He then asked Deborah Birx, the physician co-ordinating the White House’s coronavirus taskforce: “I would like you to speak to the medical doctors to see if there’s any way you can apply light and heat to cure. You know? If you could. And maybe you can, maybe you can’t.”

Birx said she had not seen any evidence that heat or UV rays could be used as a treatment for the virus.

Health experts immediately warned that sunlight was not a “miracle cure” for COVID-19 and that people should not try to treat it by tanning – especially given the risks of developing skin cancer.

On Friday, China announced it donated a further $US30 million ($47 million) to the World Health Organisation following Donald Trump’s decision to halt funding, amid concerns the UN agency is too “China-centric”.

Chinese Foreign Ministry spokesman Geng Shuang said the extra funds would help the WHO contain the virus and support developing countries in improving their public health systems.

“At this critical moment, support for WHO helps to strengthen multilateralism and the UN,” Shuang said.

via Coronavirus: Trump reveals Homeland study claiming COVID-19 struggles to survive in sunlight, heat

Scott Morrison More Popular Than Jesus And Closing In On The Beatles! – » The Australian Independent Media Network

Yes, it’s just a few weeks ago that Josh and Scott were telling us that Labor handn’t delivered a surplus since last century, but if you want to go back through history, it’s worth remembering that the only Liberal Treasurer to deliver a surplus in the last forty years is Peter Costello, who did it during the mining boom. Let’s not even point out his selling off of assets like our gold reserves for bargain prices.

I’ll just leave you with one final thought as we approach Anzac Day: Conservatives seem to have an obsession with everyone remembering what happened over a century ago , while demanding we all forget what happened last week!

Scott Morrison More Popular Than Jesus And Closing In On The Beatles! – » The Australian Independent Media Network

MPs Told They’ll Need To Accept $1500 JobKeeper Payment If They’re Not Working Until August – The Shovel

via MPs Told They’ll Need To Accept $1500 JobKeeper Payment If They’re Not Working Until August – The Shovel

via MPs Told They’ll Need To Accept $1500 JobKeeper Payment If They’re Not Working Until August – The Shovel

A Serf in the time of plague … – » The Australian Independent Media Network

From the Barons: “Keep ’em housed. Keep ’em fed. Promise ’em anything to keep ’em quiet. Once the Plague has passed we’ll march right back in again and walk all over ’em. The power, and the entitlement, remains ours!”

via A Serf in the time of plague … – » The Australian Independent Media Network

Scott Morrison Quiet – Is He Isolated With Covid-19 Or In Hawaii? – » The Australian Independent Media Network

So, maybe Scottie could go on television, and explain away my concerns. Or maybe he really has been struck down and is being kept in quarantine.

Nah, surely we’d be told.

via Scott Morrison Quiet – Is He Isolated With Covid-19 Or In Hawaii? – » The Australian Independent Media Network

It just keeps going and going: the weird, mean things the Morrison government has got into | First Dog on the Moon | Opinion | The Guardian

Screenshot_2020-03-08 It just keeps going and going the weird, mean things the Morrison government has got into First Dog o[...].pngvia It just keeps going and going: the weird, mean things the Morrison government has got into | First Dog on the Moon | Opinion | The Guardian

Scott Morrison Dazzles At The National Press Club… – » The Australian Independent Media Network

Speaking of urgency, how long do you think it’ll take for that report on whether Bridget McKenzie breached ministerial standards to reach the PM’s desk? It’s been a week and nothing yet. I mean, it’s not like they need to wait for DNA samples to come back from the lab.

But I guess it’s hard to convince someone to take one for the team when everyone else is playing for themselves.

via Scott Morrison Dazzles At The National Press Club… – » The Australian Independent Media Network

Is It Just Me? Amanda Vanstone gets AO in Australia Day Honours! – » The Australian Independent Media Network

Given people’s unhappiness, I thought I’d give you my own list.

via Is It Just Me? Amanda Vanstone gets AO in Australia Day Honours! – » The Australian Independent Media Network

Skiddy leaves his mark – » The Australian Independent Media Network

It was Tony Abbott’s ludicrous, bow-legged saunter that encapsulated the man; some wag once remarked that he looked like a cowboy leaving a rodeo portaloo. His gait was an asinine affectation, the purpose of which no doubt was to reinforce his self image of a macho man, a tough guy in red dick-stickers, but instead the ape-like amble simply highlighted the novelty of his adoption of bipedalism.

via Skiddy leaves his mark – » The Australian Independent Media Network

As An Old White Male, Nobody Listens To Me But You Can Read My Column… – » The Australian Independent Media Network

There’s a rumour going around that Scott Morrison is in Hawaii staying in a Trump hotel with his wife and family, which includes the Hillsong guy who may or may not have been uninvited to the Whitehouse. This has caused some criticism from people who think he should be providing some sort of leadership because there are one or two fires burning round the country.

via As An Old White Male, Nobody Listens To Me But You Can Read My Column… – » The Australian Independent Media Network