By Christian Marx Australia is rapidly heading towards a completely stupefied populace. This is no accident! Rather, it is a concerted effort by the vested corporate interests that own all our mainstream media, and control the LNP, via their hardline, crypto Fascist organisation, the Institute of Public Affairs. If one believed the media narrative, one…
Source: 2 + 2 = 5. AKA: The Dumbing Down of Australia – » The Australian Independent Media Network
Andrew Bolt projectile vomit in print
After almost four months of vetting and voting, Americans have successfully narrowed down their entire population to the two citizens they like least.
The painstaking process, which began in Iowa in February, occurs once every four years, and is regarded as the world’s most extensive democratically-run search for abhorred people.
“It’s an exhausting, state-by-state process. But when you’ve got over 300 million citizens, it’s always going to take some time to narrow it down to the top two most hated people,” electoral analyst Hugo Tansin said.
Tansin explained that the system – known as the Primaries – starts with a short list of 30-40 despicable people, who are then meticulously scrutinized, before being voted off one by one to find the most despised man and woman.
“It’s a very thorough process, and a very fair and effective one. It’s just a strange quirk of the system that one of these people happens to then go on to become the leader of our nation”.
“Why should they ask me to put on a uniform and go 10,000 miles from home and drop bombs and bullets on brown people in Vietnam while so-called Negro people in Louisville are treated like dogs and denied simple human rights?”
TeleSur | – – Trump initially told reporters he would “love to debate Bernie.” The Republican nominee flip flopped from …
India recently launched a “mini space shuttle” for just $14 million. Many people commented, expressing their unhappiness at India investing in space travel while so many of their people live in poverty. The space industry is worth more than a hundred billion dollars worldwide. Most of this is dominated by just a few countries. If India can break into this industry at a lower cost, it could provide a massive stimulus to their economy.
And let’s take a look at a few of the things that were more expensive than their latest launch, shall we?
Following her allegation that the Liberal Party is trying to undermine her, Sophie Mirabella now claims that voters may be against her too.
“Look, you can’t rule it out. Every time I ask someone in this electorate whether they’re going to vote for me, they go all quiet and avoid eye contact. So yeah, I definitely think there’s something going on here. There’s a conspiracy against me”.
She said had been the victim of unpopularity. “What’s the saying? ‘If you want a friend in politics get a dog’. Well I tried to get a dog the other day, but the workers at the pet shop conspired against me and wouldn’t sell me one”.
NEW YORK – (CT&P) – Just one day after a “hit piece” in the New York Times about how Donald Trump treats women was published, a new poll suggests that his support among abused women has surged to new heights.
The Quinnipiac/SurveyMonkey poll taken of 1000 current and former beauty queens, victims of domestic abuse, and sex slaves across the United States this morning found that an average of 80% of the abused/objectified woman demographic found Trump attractive. 70% said they would marry Trump immediately if he became available, and 65% said they would have sex with him no questions asked.
“The article in the Times seems to have really shored up his support among women who are used to being viewed as a piece of meat to be used and discarded,” said Dr. Emilio Lizardo of SurveyMonkey.
“Women who have had their personalities beaten down to nothing and their lives shattered at the hands of men seem to really dig The Donald.”
Rowanne Brewer Lane, a former model who was featured in the article, told Fox News this morning that the Times spun the information and were out to get a “good man.”
“After the first inspection, in which Mr. Trump carefully examined me from head to toe and probed critical areas for firmness, we got along great. He was a perfect gentleman and was even nice enough to ask if I was on my period before our first date. You don’t run into that kind of caring, sensitive man very often.”
Petra Warmtwatavich, Miss Siberia 2012, agreed with Lane.
“Mr. Trump very nice,” said Warmtwatavich. “Mr. Trump have many rubles. I marry Mr. Trump but Petra need more than small American penis can give.”
There have been no polls taken yet of the general public or of the all-important married women demographic after the Times piece was published, but pundits believe it will do nothing to help Trump’s huge negatives with women in general.
“Trump is unique in American politics because we’ve never seen such a moronic buffoon reach such heights,” said former Vermont governor Howard Dean on MSNBC. “After this article he’ll no doubt try to go out and play the ‘abused woman’ card, but it won’t get him anywhere. There are simply not enough cases of domestic abuse out there to get him elected.”
LOS ANGELES – (CT&P) – Three men who went on a drunken rampage involving gunfire, vomiting, skinny dipping and the death of a tiny endangered fish in Death Valley National Park are now in custody, officials said today.
The men, now identified as John Ya Ya, John Many Jars, and John Small Berries, are all on the ballot as Trump delegates in the California primary. They were seen on surveillance video the evening of April 30 driving around a secured gate surrounding Devils Hole, a 40-acre detached unit in Death Valley National Park. The habitat is also home to the endangered Devils Hole pupfish.
Once they entered Devils Hole, park officials said the men shot at signs, gate locks and a security system motion sensor. The men fired at least 10 rounds, according to authorities. They also left behind beer cans, vomit, and a “Make America Great Again” trucker’s cap.
During the excursion, one man jumped into the waters of Devils Hole and swam around for a while shouting “Mexicans are rapists!” and “Muslims suck!”
For some reason the man left his pink boxer shorts floating in the water. They are currently being tested for alien DNA.
Park officials later found a dead pupfish in the water — one of only 115 that currently inhabit Devils Hole.
Pupfish, which grow to about an inch in length, roughly the size of Donald Trump’s dick, are the tenacious descendants of fish that inhabited an ancient lake that once covered Death Valley.
According to the National Park Service, the pupfish population fluctuates between 100 and 200 in the winter and between 300 and 500 in the summer. The latest population numbers were tallied in a survey last month, park officials said.
“A necropsy is being performed on the pupfish to determine whether the vandals’ actions may have caused the death of this member of an endangered species,” park officials said in a statement.
Investigators are examining the area and reviewing surveillance video footage of the incident.
Park officials said the men not only shot the motion sensor, but also tried to remove cables in an attempt to dismantle the security system, but failed because they were so fucking stupid.
Video footage shows the men climbing over the fence and driving away in a blue Yamaha Rhino, an off-road vehicle.
The vehicle was later pulled over and the three men were arrested while driving up Hollywood Boulevard hurling empty beer cans at pedestrians, officials said.
Officials credit the swift arrest of the men to a tip provided by an anonymous caller who claimed that Ted Cruz was sent by God to rule over America.
The three men face charges of destruction of government property, killing an endangered species by toxic urine discharge, and chronic criminal stupidity.
How Australia spends its money, and how this compares to other OECD countries.
When the former London mayor Ken Livingstone said in an interview that Hitler was “supporting Zionism” before he “went mad and ended up killing six million Jews”, he was quickly suspended from the Labour Party, which was already in the throes of a painful row over anti-semitism. But while Livingstone’s tone-deaf comments came at a very politically sensitive moment, the historical error at their heart is all too familiar.
It’s budget night! Play along at home with The Shovel’s Budget Night Bingo.
Follow us @TheShovel as we live-tweet the budget from just before 7:30pm EST. It’ll be just like the CIA’s live-tweet of bin Laden’s assassination, but less appropriate.
More than 40 members of Brisbane’s Muslim community talk about their lives, ambitions, and beliefs as part of a special project, Faces of Islam.
THE GAMILARAAY 500?
Before Major Nunn set out on his evil killing spree in my sacred Gamilaraay lands. He was given orders by the governor of the time to get rid of the black problem in the Gamilaraay Nation.
Over several weeks as he was heading up Mt Kaputar he heard loud roars and thought it was thunder.
When he kept looking up he could see all these flickering lights and thought it was lighting and then the sky turning dark, which he thought were rain clouds.
When he and his men had reached the top of Mt Kaputar and looked out over the land he could not believe what lay before him.
The loud roar that he thought was thunder was the Gamilaraay 500 + who where being led as always by our brave Gamilaraay woman banging on there shields and possum skin drums.
He and his men could also see that the flickering lights that they thought was lightning was the many fires still burning through the night.
What he thought were rain clouds was nothing more than the 500 + proud strong Gamilaraay warriors and our woman dancing and all singing in unison the mighty fighting dance with dust flying high over their heads.
After witnessing this Major Nunn and his men took off back to Singleton.
Then several weeks had passed and our mob began thinking that this evil man was not coming back into our sacred lands.
So the Gamilaraay 500 + had all dispersed and went back to their clan areas.
But then this evil man came back several months later with more troopers and committed genocide on our then small band of unsuspecting proud brave warriors, beautiful strong woman and children and this is what is now known as Slaughterhouse Creek
It is fair to say that the revenant candidate for the seat of Indi, Sophie Mirabella, would never win a nation-wide popularity contest. At the end of the 2013, the normally placid independent Tony Windsor bade her farewell from parliament with the salutation: “She is the nastiest – I reckon if you put it to a vote to all politicians, she’d come up number one.”
Source: Knees and elbows | The Monthly
Omar Nazzal, a well-known journalist in Ramallah, has been in custody since Saturday on terror charges, based on secret evidence. His lawyer says that his alleged contact with militants was an integral part of his…
Source: Israel arrests Palestinian journalist en route to int’l conference | +972 Magazine
Local MP Christopher Pyne says the announcement of a new $50 billion contract to build 12 submarines in Adelaide will give residents another going-out option on Friday and Saturday nights.
“Whether you’re working directly on the subs, or you just want to go down and watch, this will be an exciting place to see and be seen come the weekend,” Mr Pyne said.
Premier Jay Weatherill said that with large spotlights likely to be used for night shifts, there would be a party-like atmosphere at the shipbuilding docks. “There will be lights. There will be noise. There will be people. Sparks will quite literally fly!”
Mr Weatherill said his Government was considering a shuttle service between the city and the Osborne shipyards for revellers. Residents of Sydney have been invited to come to Adelaide to see what it’s like to be out after 10:30pm.
SCRANTON – (CT&P) – Reuters is reporting that GOP presidential candidate and subhuman bigot Ted Cruz has been arrested after terrorizing several people at a rest area in eastern Pennsylvania.
According to the report local law enforcement in Gouldsboro, a small town outside Scranton, arrested Cruz after he threatened a group of potential Trump delegates with a nine millimeter pistol.
The delegates, who are all running in Tuesday’s primary, were apparently returning from a retreat and strategy session in Mt. Pocono.
Magda Goebbels, an uncommitted delegate leaning toward Trump, told reporters that although Cruz was wearing a “ridiculous disguise,” she knew it was him because she had met him at campaign rallies and recognized the stench.
“He can wear any fucked up costume he wants, but there’s no mistaking that odious asshole,” said Goebbels.
The police report stated that Cruz approached his victims on the pretense that he was a bathroom monitor and anyone entering the bathroom had to expose their genitals so he could be sure no “hanky-panky” was going on inside.
Once Cruz had individuals off to the side Goebbels and other victims reported that Cruz whispered, “I’m the Zodiac, support Ted Cruz or die.”
The effort seems to have backfired on Cruz because Trump supporters don’t seem to be easily intimidated.
“I don’t care what that cretin from Texas does, I’m with Trump,” said R.W. Scrotum, a plumber from Wilkes-Barre. “I told him to leave me alone or I’d take that pistol and shove it up his ass.”
Cruz was released on $100,000 bond. He faces charges of threatening assholes with a firearm, malicious mischief, and being a religious kook obsessed with other people’s genitals.
“It’s a damn shame,” said Goebbels while being interviewed by 11 Dead or Alive in Scranton.
“I really liked some of Ted’s ideas, but all that dildo stuff really soured me on him. No one comes between me and my vibrator.”
Has something gone adrift within the moral compass of our ‘news’ reporting? In the past week, 64 Afghans have been killed in the largest bomb to have exploded in Kabul in 15 years. At least 340 were wounded. The Taliban set off their explosives at the very wall of the ‘elite’ security force – watch out for that word ‘elite’ – which was supposed to protect the capital. Whole families were annihilated. No autopsies for them. Local television showed an entire family – a mother and father and three children blown to pieces in a millisecond – while the city’s
PHILADELPHIA – (CT&P) – “It’s just been so long since I’ve had any,” lamented Ted Cruz as he addressed a crowd of supporters at a campaign stop at Lucky Spa Massage with Happy Ending in Hershey last night.
Cruz was referring to the fact that he had not had sex with anyone but himself in many years.
“Heidi hasn’t had anything to do with my penis since we did our Christian duty and reproduced; all she wants to do is lock herself in the bathroom with that vibrator. I’m telling you, hearing the purr of a five horsepower Tecumseh engine when you’re horny as hell is pure torture!
“I’ve tried intern after intern and I can’t even get a blow job. I’m better looking than Bill Clinton aren’t I? I don’t see how he did it.
“I can’t even buy a lay. All the prostitutes I’ve tried say that I’m too dirty and smell bad, but I take a shower at least once a week like all Texans do. It’s just not fair!”
Cruz’s proposed legislation, dubbed the Abstinence Until Ted Get’s Himself Laid Act of 2016, would go into effect immediately and apply to every citizen of the United States, regardless of sexual preference.
“I don’t want to inconvenience anybody but I’m hoping this will force some bitch to step up to the plate and make a sacrifice for God and country,” said Cruz, as he gently massaged his testicles.
“I’m just sick and tired of banging all these goats, although I must admit they have lovely eyes and their horns provide excellent leverage,” said the deranged senator from Texas.
The bill calls for a complete ban on sex until Cruz enters the White House, when he can force women to have sex with him by executive order.
Congress is scheduled to take up the bill just after it votes on whether or not to launch Cruz into space along with spent fuel rods from our nation’s nuclear facilities.
Channel Nine allegedly paid compensation to Ali Elamine allowing Sally Faulkner and the 60 Minutes crew to return to Australia. Vision courtesy ABC News 24
Freed 60 Minutes reporter Tara Brown says it is “great to be going home” after she and her Channel Nine crew were released from a Lebanese prison overnight and, hours later, boarded a flight back to Australia.
Source: 60 Minutes crew freed in Lebanon: Tara Brown says it’s ‘great to be going home’
Celebrations are a way of human life. But some are so strange, it questions the very definition of the concept. The Bani Festival celebrated at the Devaragattu Temple in the Kurnool district of Andhra Pradesh illustrates the point. Every Dusshera, hundreds of lathi-wielding devotees from Andhra and Karnataka gather at this temple to hit each each other on the heads at midnight! Drenched in blood, these men go on with the celebration till the beak of dawn, to commemorate the killing of a demon by Mala-Malleshwara (Shiva). According to the temple priest, this festival has been celebrated for over a 100 years, and earlier axes and spears were used instead of lathis! This year, 56 people were injured during Bani. Medical attendants and policemen are deployed during this festival but they mostly remain spectators, in the face of the the extreme frenzy.
India shares a very old bond with snakes. These frightening beings have played a prominent role throughout Indian mythology and folklore. India is known to many still, as the Land Of Snake Charmers. Till date, the fifth day of the lunar month of Shravan is celebrated as Nag Panchami across India and Nepal. Live Cobras, without their venomous fangs removed, are worshipped! Priests sprinklehaldi-kumkum and flower petals on their raised hoods. Devotees feed them milk and even rats. It is popularly believed that snakes do not bite on Nag Panchami.
Puli Kali, celebrated mainly in Thrissur dictrict of Kerala is one colourful spectacle bursting with energy. Performed by trained artists, Puli Kali is celebrated on the fourth day of Onam. Painted in bright yellow, red and black, performers take to the street, dancing to traditional folk beats. Every year, thousands of people gather to watch this unbelievable sight.
Held every November at the time of the Kartik Purnima full moon, the Pushkar Camel Fair is a particularly spectacular sight to behold. For five days, over 50,000 camels are shaved, dressed up, paraded, entered into beauty contests and races, and traded. Add to that an array of musicians, dancers, acrobats, magicians and snake charmers to entertain the crowd!
Fact, they say, is stranger than fiction. The ritual of walking on fire proves it. Originating in Tamil Nadu, the practice of Theemithi has spread to Sri Lanka, Singapore and South Africa as well. Theemithi is part of a larger ceremony stretching over a two-and-a-half month period where parts of the Mahabharata is re-enacted, totalling up to 18 distinguishable rites. The festival of Theemithi is a celebration of Draupadi, wife of the Pandavas. After the Battle of Kurukshetra, Draupadi walked across a bed of fire and emerged as fresh as a flower. Theemithi is a re-enactment of the same, and is believed to grant a wish or blessing by the goddess.
At times, faith takes over our reasoning and makes us do things without ever questioning them. The bizarre practice of baby tossing has been practised in India for years by both, Hindus and Muslims. At Baba Umer Dargah near Sholapur, Maharashtra, babies are dropped from a height of 50 feet, and caught in a sheet held by waiting men. A similar custom is observed at the Sri Santeswar temple near Indi, in the state of Karnataka. This ritual has been followed for over 700 years and is believed to bring prosperity to the family. The National Commission For Protection Of Child Rights is investigating these cases. According to organizers, no injuries have been reported so far.
Faith is a precious ray of light that pulls us out of our inner darkness. The same faith, at times, takes on frightening proportions. Celebrated in Tamil Nadu and parts of southern India during the Tamil month of Thai, Thaipoosam is a festival that honours Lord Murugan (or Kartikeya, the son of Shiva and Parvati) receiving a lance to destroy the evil army of Tarakasura. Following a 48 day fast, many devotees pierce their bodies with hooks, skewers and lances called vel. Some even try pulling tractors or other heavy objects with the hooks in their skin; others pierce their tongue and cheek to impede speech and thereby attain full concentration on the Lord. They enter into a trance during such piercing due to the incessant drumming and chanting. The horrifying sight is definitely not for the faint of heart.
If Bull-Fighting reminds you of Spanish matadors, think again. A more rustic and dangerous form of the sport has been played in India for over a century now. Jallikattu is a part of Pongal celebrations. Jallikattu bulls are raised wild and special care is taken to feed and exercise them, so they develop into sturdy beasts fit for fighting. Hundreds of men chase the bull, trying to snatch the prize from its horns. Unlike Spanish bull-fighting, the bull isn’t killed in Jallikattu. It is the matador who is left vulnerable, because he cannot carry weapons and the bulls’ horns are sharpened. In the past two decades, over 200 people have died indulging in this dangerous sport. In May 2014, the Supreme Court of India banned Jallikattu.
Casteism has been one of India’s oldest problems. While the society has changed and condemns such unwarranted discrimination, many still hold on to it. The Kukke Subramania Temple has a strange centuries old tradition called Madey Snana or Spit Bath. Those from lower castes roll on the floor over food leftovers of Brahmins on banana leaves, to rid themselves of various ailments. This practice was banned in 2010, but it had to be lifted in 2011 after protests by the Malekudiya tribe.The ritual has been categorised as a blind belief in the proposed Karnataka Prevention of Superstitious Practices Bill (2013) after progressive leaders and liberals in the state upped their ante against the controversial practice.
The formidable Aghori Sadhus of Banaras are easily recognisable in their long matted hair and bodies smeared in ash. Their way of connecting to God is, very subtly put, off-beat. These monistic saints believe in renouncing the world by finding ‘purity in the filthiest.’ This leads them to eat human remains after cremation and have intercourse with corpses. They are believed to be posses tantrik powers of healing.
Just as they had shown in Lagaan, rains are a big deal in India. A lot of lives depend on it. No wonder no stone is left unturned to please the rain god into sending his showers of blessings. Frog weddings have been reported in villages across Assam and Maharashtra, while in Karnataka, donkeys are married. Some places have even reported dog weddings. These weddings are a big celebration where all Hindu marriage rituals are observed and the marriage is conducted by a priest.
Cows are sacred to the Hindus. This devotion is taken to a whole new level at Bhiwdawad village, in Maharashtra. The Govardhan festival is celebrated on the occasion of Enadakshi, a day after Diwali. Villagers decorate their cattle with flowers, colours and henna, and lay down on the ground letting allowing cows to trample over them! This ritual takes place after a five day fast. The whole village fathers to witness this spectacle, which they believe will move the gods into answering their prayers.
This ritual art form performed in Kerala’s Kali temples is as fascinating as it as shocking. Dancers dress up as Garuda, the vehicle of Lord Vishnu who quenched the goddess Kali’s thirst with blood after slaying Darika the demon. After the dance performance, they hang like eagles (Garudan Thookam) from a shaft, by hooking the flesh on the backs! These hanging ‘Garudas‘ are taken around the city in a colourful procession. This ritual is carried out on Makara Bharani Day and Kumbha Bharani Day.
Most religions consider Moksha or redemption as the ultimate end of all human endeavours. Ignorance, according to Jains and Buddhists is what stands in the way. In many texts, hair is often read as a metaphor for human illusion, attachment and vanity. Upon their initiation, Jain monks and nuns renounce their worldly attachments by painfully pulling out each strand of hair from their heads. The wounds are then covered in dried cow dung ash to heal.
At first, the Dhinga Gavar festival may strike you as strange. But then you’ll realize how much fun it might actually be. A part of the Rajasthani Gangaur festival, Dhinga Gavar is only celebrated in Jodhpur. Shiva’s consort, Parvati (Gangaur), had once playfully teased him by dressing up as a tribal woman. Gavar is considered to be the playful side of Gangaur. After sunset, statues of Dhinga Gavar are put up at 11 locations, all decorated with up to 30 kgs of gold! And that isn’t all. Offerings of cannabis are made to the diety! Wait, there’s more. Women take out processions, dressed in all sorts of costumes – Hindu gods and goddesses, police, saints, dacoits and what not – carrying lathis to hit people with and protect the statues! It is a popular belief that any unmarried man who comes near these women and is stricken by the stick gets married soon.
Every year in the month of April, the Festival of Kateel Durga Parameswari Temple is celebrated over 8 days. Of the many themed performances during this time, the centuries-old tradition of Agni Keli is the most intriguing. Hundreds of bare-bodied devotees hurl flaming palm fronds at each other. Spectators watch as these men attempt to set one another ablaze! Those who suffer burns are then sprayed with water of the kumkumarchana.
Every year, on the 18th day of the Tamil month of Aadi, thousands of devotees flock the Mahalakshmi Temple, Mettu Mahadhanapuram, in the Karur District of Tamil Nadu, to willingly allow the priest to smash coconuts on their heads for good luck and health. As the story goes, 187 coconut shaped stones were dug out at the location of the temple. During the Raj, the Britishers wanted to build a railway track across the temple and villagers were against it. To test their devotion, the British struck a deal: if they could break these stones on their heads, the course of the railway line would be changed. The villagers succeeded and the temple was saved. The tradition has been followed till date, despite warnings by medical practitioners.
The rains bring forth new life. And when it turns its back on us, many turn to the Rain God. Varun is the Hindu God of water. The Varuna Yajna has been performed across Maharashtra, Karnataka and Tamil Nadu to appease him into bestowing rains upon his people. The yajna is performed by temple priests immersing themselves in barrels of water and incanting Lord Varun’s name one lakh times.
This will make you very, very uneasy. Muharram translates into ‘forbidden.’ It is the holy month of remembrance and mourning. Mourning begins on the first day of the month with a 10 day fast and culminates into The Day of Ashura (tenth day), when Shia Muslims carry out the ritual of mass self-flogging to commemorate the martyrdom of Hussein, the grandson of Prophet Muhammad. In a terrifying display of devotion, men mercilessly whip their bodies with blades attached to chains till they are are soaked in their own blood. In their state of religious trance, they claim they do not feel the pain.
It happens only in India, right? A part of the Navratra celebrations, Ajudh or Astra Puja is an occasion to pay one’s respect to all tools, machinery, gadgets, implements and especially weapons. The rituals vary but this puja is observed across India.
If you’ve watched the Exorcist, you know how frightening it is to get rid of spirits that haunt you. But in India, we have a jugaad for it: marriage. In many parts of the country, girls born with a tooth, or those born with facial deformation are believed to be possessed by ghosts. Marrying an animal, typically a dog or a goat, is believed to rid one of spirits and bad omens, and at times, mangal dosh.
At the Kamakhya Temple in Guwahati, the object of reverence is the vagina of the Mother Goddess. According to legend, when Sati, the wife of Lord Shiva, jumped into the fire, unable to bear her father’s insult to her husband, Shiva went into a terrible rage and did the terrible Tandav Nritya, carrying her corpse. Parts of her body fell to the earth, forming Shakti Peeths. The Kamakhya Temple was formed where the Yoni (vagina) fell. Every year around June, the Goddess goes through her menstrual cycle. The temple remains shut for three days, and is believed to turn red. This is the time when the Ambubachi Mela is celebrated. This tantrik fertility mela attracts thousands of tantriks,aghoris and sadhus from across the world, displaying their formidable psychic powers. The colour red – red flowers, vermillion, red cloth – stands out during the rituals. The maddening display of magic and mysticism makes for an extraordinary spectacle.
We’ve often been told that God lies in each of us. But how many times have you seen God possess a human body? Those who have witnessed North Malabar’s Theyyam ritual worship will know how intimidating it can be. Dressed in elaborate make up and headdresses, dancers perform to drumbeats and incantations reciting myths and legends, of the deity of the shrine. As the beats become more intense, the metaphysical combines with this realm and the dancer metamorphoses into the deity or the Theyyam. In their ‘possessed’ state, they dance on fire, bless devotees and perform miracles. Sometimes, a cock sacrifice is made and an offering of blood is made to Theyyam. Once dancers are out of the fervent trance, they have no recollection of what transpired during the possession.
Source
Marriage is a big deal in India. Especially if you happen to be a girl. And that’s how a girl attaining puberty becomes a social occasion celebrated with great pride and enthusiasm across many Indian states. In a bid to announce the sexual maturity and readiness for marriage, the girl’s family dresses her up like a bride and conducts a ‘marriage’ ceremony sans the groom and vidaai. Friends and relatives are invited to bless the ‘bride’ and shower her with gifts. This ceremony also includes other rituals that last for several days, during which she is kept in a separate room, and not allowed to meet any men, including her father or brothers.
WASHINGTON – (CT&P) – Earlier today during a phone interview on CNBC’s “Squawk Box,” presidential candidate and sexually frustrated deviant Ted Cruz proposed legislation that would institute a nationwide ban on the sale of dildos, vibrators, and any other sex toys designed to entertain or satisfy women.
The legislation, dubbed the “Compensating for a Small Penis Patriotic Religious Freedom Act,” would make the sale of sexual aids illegal in the United States. Anyone attempting to purchase such articles would be faced with “stiff” fines and jail time.
“The Bible says that sex should be restricted to married couples who wish to produce offspring according to God’s plan,” said Cruz.
“A dildo or vibrator inevitably becomes a third party in any relationship, and it’s no different from bigamy, which was outlawed when God changed his mind about all that ‘multiple wives stuff’ and wrote the New Testament.”
Co-host Joe Kernen asked Cruz if he had been smoking something before the interview and implied that he believed that he had clearly lost his fucking mind.
“I’ve long believed that a woman’s place is in the bed or in the kitchen, and because she is the ‘weaker vessel,’ she should always follow her husband’s instructions and do her best to please him, no matter what his perversions may be,” said Cruz.
“God made woman as a helpmate, not an equal, and if a man’s dick is too small to get the job done, then his wife just has to live with it.”
Kelly Evans, co-anchor of “Closing Bell” who happened to be present during the call, abruptly ended the interview by hanging up on Cruz saying that the candidate was a “Neanderthal religious kook who doesn’t stand a chance in hell of ever becoming president, and thank God for that.”
Heidi Cruz, long-suffering wife of the lunatic senator from Texas, issued a press release shortly after the interview that stated that she and Ted would be having a long talk this evening after his appearance in Rochester.
In an embarrassing blunder, the RBA today released a new Australian $5 note featuring a woman who has never actually lived here.
The RBA blamed the error on a junior intern who they claimed was messing around with the designs in Photoshop. “We accidently sent the wrong mock-up to print. It was, of course, supposed to feature a prominent Australian”.
The note, which also features native Australian birds and Nandos grilled corn on the cob, will enter circulation in September this year.
The Prime Minister has announced a new high speed rail policy that will connect the country’s two largest cities once every three years, or more frequently when there’s a double dissolution.
Mr Turnbull, who discovered the policy in a folder marked ‘For Election Years Only’, said the new train would provide a quick link between the Government and innovation.
“This is the fastest, most convenient election policy we’ll see, until it’s next released in 2019,” he said. “I can jump on this policy at 9am in Sydney, and then get off it by lunchtime”. He said all the mocked-up map graphics and stock photos of bullet trains on a blurred background were ready to go.
But Opposition Leader Bill Shorten was scathing of the policy. “Malcolm Turnbull likes to talk about train platforms, but where’s his platform for jobs?” he said.
The Right doesn’t reject the concept of universal human rights because it threatens the Zionist project, they do so because it would mean seeing Palestinians as equals. By Dror Etkes There is a positive aspect…
Source: What’s so threatening about human rights? | +972 Magazine
Saturday April 9 2016 1 The Crickey BludgerTrack analysis of combined polling this week has it 50.8-49.2 to the Coalition. After a few weeks where it appeared the trend to Labor had tapered off, the BludgerTrack poll aggregate records a solid nudge to Labor this week on the back a Newspoll result crediting it with…
The government’s plan to deregulate university fees will lead to a massive blowout in the cost of higher education.
olddogthoughts 
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