Tag: Marriage

American Politics

Listen to him

So, what is in a name? Not much, instead, what Trump says or doesn’t say should be the focal point of this presidential campaign. Donald Trump has not said he will accept the outcome of the 2024 election if he loses. Indeed, he said there would be a “bloodbath” if he loses the election, so Mike Pence may wish to stay home on January 6 2025. Donald Trump said he would encourage Russia to do “whatever the hell they want” to any NATO member, so it is safe to say Vladimir Putin is rooting for Trump to win the 2024 Presidential Election. Then there is Donald Trump’s desire to be a dictator, even only walking it back to one day (that is all a dictator needs), as well as using Adolf Hitler’s rhetoric of referring to Latin American people as being vermin. Donald Trump’s stated economic agenda of reducing taxes, including abolishing corporate tax, has been dismissed by economists and business leaders as nonsensical and will increase inflation, not to mention the economic disaster he caused during his first term.

Joe Biden is right: Listen to what Donald Trump says, and what you hear will terrify you.

Listen to him

Meet the Trumps

Stormy Weather: Trumps Forego 13th Wedding Anniversary Celebrations | Crooks and Liars

After a week that featured a $130,000 payoff to a porn star to keep quiet about an affair soon after they were married, and further intimations by Trump nemesis Michael Wolff that Trump is currently embroiled in yet another affair, apparently First Lady Melania wants nothing to do with the “tiny fingered, Cheeto-faced, ferret wearing shitgibbon”

via Stormy Weather: Trumps Forego 13th Wedding Anniversary Celebrations | Crooks and Liars

Humour, Uncategorized

God Doesn’t Give A Fuck Who Gets Married

By on September 26, 2016

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The Almighty Father couldn’t give two shits which humans want to sign a piece of paper outlining their commitment to each other, it has been revealed.

In a wide-ranging interview about his work, which briefly touched on humanity, God said he really couldn’t care less what people do. “I literally don’t give a shit. I’ve got a million other things to worry about right now, and that’s just on Pluto. Next question please.”

Pressed further on the issue, God became visibly frustrated, saying he had only allowed time for one question per species. “Sorry, explain it again. Two humans want to be recognised by some law that you’ve made up and you’re bringing me into this? You guys crack me up”.

Reminded that there was a passage in the Bible that warned against homosexuality, God laughed. “I also said you shouldn’t cut the corners of your beard. But you guys don’t take that stuff seriously do you?”

Political Donations

Parties need money, business supplies it

According to the Labor Party’s rising star, Senator Sam Dastyari, 10 big companies control our political process. You don’t need to look far to find evidence of the power wielded by “the big end of town”.

Source: Parties need money, business supplies it

Marriage Equality

Donald Trump Believes In Sanctity Of Being Married Three Times By The Shovel on July 7, 2015

donald trump marriage

Billionaire and US Presidential candidate Donald Trump says marriage should be between a man and a woman, and then another woman, and then one more woman.

He said recent laws in the US legalising same-sex marriage went against God’s word. “God stated very clearly that marriage is a sacred bond between a man and a woman that can only be broken through protracted legal negotiations”.

He said he believed wholeheartedly in traditional marriage. “Traditionally I get married about once a decade”.

Trump’s advice to young men considering marriage? “Choose wisely. You will be together for the rest of your next eight years”.

Humour

Satan Delighted With Supreme Court Ruling

satanhappppy

THE RIVER STYX – (CT&P) – According to sources close to Satan, the Lord of the Underworld is absolutely delighted with the Supreme Court’s decision to legalize gay marriage in all 50 states.

Satanic Press Secretary Lord Balthazar told reporters this afternoon that “His Majesty could not be happier. He hasn’t quit smiling since the decision was announced. In fact, he’s given all us demons three days off in order to celebrate.

“I honestly can’t remember Lucifer being this happy since the Spanish Inquisition. I mean, he just sat there and laughed his ass off when all those hypocritical religious kooks on the right starting Tweeting their responses. He thought it was a riot.”

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When Balthazar was asked what Beelzebub’s immediate plans were in light of the decision, the press  secretary explained that it would really just be more of the same.

“We plan to send some extra demons up to possess some more religious and political figures so we can give people like Rick Santorum and Mike Huckabee a hand spewing their hate filled rhetoric, and we also want to encourage self-righteous assholes like Franklin Graham and Pat Robertson to keep up the good work!”

When a reporter asked if Satan had any plans to try to capture right-wing Christian souls and drag them down to Hell, Balthazar said “Are you kidding, they’re already doing such a great job damning themselves I really don’t see how we could make things any better.”

Balthazar said that “The Boss” was so damn happy that he’s throwing a party tonight and the guest of honor will be former Pastor Fred Phelps.

“Rumor has it that we’re all going to get a turn ramming a red-hot poker up his ass,” said Balthazar. “I can’t wait.”